floranna: (Default)
I mentioned some time ago that I have been acting in front of a camera. Well. ^^'

I was in a drama high school, and many of my classmates continued to a field where they are with media, or performers, etc. One of them is learning to become a...light expert? As in tv and movies, I can't remember the right word. She posted in Facebook that she and rather big group in her school are doing a school project and they would need extras. They already had the actors for speaking roles. The only problem was that the extras would have to be naked. I conidered this for awhile and when I was assured that there would be several extras naked, I agreed, as it would take only two days.

I went there, got the make up and the filth on me. The short film told how pigs had mutated to become, well, humans, and humans were their food but regular people didn't know that humans were sentient. In true Finnish fashion, there were outdoor filmings. In bloody february. The first day we were at the back of a van and walking to it, absolutely naked. It was actually quite fun. ^^ Except that my primary school classmate's father was there, as he is a cameraman and apparently teaches there too. It was bit awkward but later when we bumped to each other in may and my parents were there too he called me rather brave. ^^

The skin paint didn't really get off, so I decided to scrub only my face and hands as next day I would get a new coat of it anyways.

Next day we were in a basement where the air was honestly quite awful and made me feel like I was always about to sneeze. At the end of the day we went to sauna, mixed oviously and tried to scrub the paint and powder and whatever off. In the end I decided to screw it and let it get off naturally, and it took about two weeks to completely be off. =D

I saw the short film and it was actually, honestly quite good. I wish I could get a DVD from it, I would like to look and review my own acting in it.

But in the end it was rather body-positive experience and I loved it. I didn't feel ashamed or embarassed, and I got to see a quite a lot of dicks. Whish isn't that fun when they are on middle-aged and older men. There was a one man who flirted with me, but he was old enough to be my father and he backed off when I said that it was not appreciated. He was also occasionally bit too close to me, but he didn't give me anxiety or uneasy feelings, unlike some. (check my last post if I have friended you)
floranna: (Default)
Prompt 1:
A fic where Ruby was one of the good guys.

Prompt 2:
Chuck and Becky get married and have children.

Prompt 3:
AU where Jo is alive, she and Dean go to a hunt together. Sam is...somewhere else.

Prompt 4:
Garth and Winchesters go to a hunt together, but this time his lady love and her twins are in danger. Please include them too, as adorable as you can!

Prompt 5:
Victor Henricksen survived and became a great hunter.

Prompt 6:
Crossover - CSI - Boys get to CSIs radar. Extra triple points if you give David Hodges a big role! He is my favourite CSI character.

As you can see, I prefer to give pretty open prompts. So please, go wild! And you can always include more characters in fics.
floranna: (Default)
I am sorry that I have been quiet here. I am far more active in tumblr, where I am Floranna2, but even there I mainly just reblog stuff.

So much has been happening in these past months. Some of it good, some of it bad and some just genuinelly frustrating. I actually want to talk about all of that, but I think I will make talk about those things in separate posts. May take days to get through them all, but that ust makes me update far more often.

My eating has been...pretty up-and-down. I can't remember if i hvae said this, but binge eating disorder is oretty, well, not new but undiagnosed in Finland. I was lucky that I got into some group therapy with others who have the same disease. First was six meetings long and the second was fifteen meetings long and both were pilot projects. It has been amazingly helpful and I have gotten some very good friends from there.

I still binge and I am nowhere near healing, but I am getting better. But this is not what I meant to talk about. One of the hosts (?) was writing a book about binge eating and it was published this spring. She sent emails to us of any of us were willing to give an interview to a newspaper, nameless or not. Some agreed to do it nameless, but I was willing to give an interview with my full name and picture. I thought my part would be only a small part of it, but in the end there were two massive pictures of me with our family's cat and my interview took nearly half of the text in that arycle and it was a full spread.

Next day a news people call and ask if I was willing to do a television interview to the news. I said yes again. The full interview took about 5 minutes and can still be found in the 'net, as they had to chop it down for the actual news.

I am still pretty flabbergasted about this, but all the feedback has been positive. As I have a very rare last name, my parents' friends have been asking if I am their girl and have said that I have been very brave in telling all that about myself and my struggles. I did have to call my grandpa and tell him about my eating disorder after he found out about it after all this, which I wasn't very proud about. It wasn't funny to tell him about it, when he bareky knows about anorexia or bulimia.

I could probably link that interview but it's in Finnish, so...
floranna: (Default)
Originally posted by [livejournal.com profile] neo_prodigy at Prevent the Flogging of a 15 Year Old Rape Victim



Alright, it's time to boost the signal even further.

The petition is still ongoing but we need more people to sign.

Here's the break down:

In Maldives, a 15 year old girl who has been abused since she was a child by her step-father and his friends have been sentenced to a 100 lashes. At age 11, the girl had become pregnant due to her father's abuse. Her mother did nothing. The girl gave birth to a baby that was later killed. Her parents have been brought to court over this case however because the girl has had sex with another man when she was 15, she is being charged for it by the courts. This is the reason for why she is getting a 100 lashes. However, it is obvious that this girl had suffered extreme trauma since she was young and furthermore, the courts have done nothing to 'punish' the man she had sex with. This girl needs professional help and not to suffer even further.

The current Maldivian President, Dr. Mohamed Waheed Hassan Manik has said that he is deeply saddened by the sentence and will ask the courts to review their decision. The Attorney General has said there are issues with the court's decision. However, they are facing pressure from conservative religious groups aswell as sections of the public who want the girl to face this cruel punishment.

However, in the face of growing international and local pressure we cannot let the Maldivian Government slide this matter under the rug. Sign the petition below to tell the Maldivian Government to review the decision to punish the girl and provide her with the necessary therapy she needs and deserves aswell as pass the necessary legislation to make sure that something like this doesn't happen again.

Sign the Petition here:

http://www.avaaz.org/en/petition/Prevent_a_rape_victim_from_being_punished/?evpCEcb
floranna: (Default)
Title: Cell
Fandom: Avatar the Last Airbender
Word Count: 1.050
Characters: Zuko, Zhao
Parings: Zuko/Zhao
Warnings: Rape, Dark, Alternate Universe - Canon


Summary: Zuko got caught by Zhao after saving Aang.


Fic is here.
floranna: (Default)
Title: Dancers
Fandom: Brave 2012
Word Count: 1.017
Characters: Elinor, Fergus, Merida
Parings: Elinor/Fergus
Warnings: None
Summary: Queen was a human again, and it was time to celebrate.


Fic is here.
floranna: (Default)
Title: Stone
Fandom: White Collar, Supernatural
Word Count: 1.031
Characters: Peter Burke, Neal Caffrey, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Castiel
Parings: None
Warnings: weird attacks, Madness, Angst
Summary: Neal touches a cursed object, and no one has fun.
Author's notes: I actually really really like Neal, even if people might find it hard to believe after this. Written while feeling depressed and with a massive headache. I would say takes part somewhere in WC season 2 and SPN season 5. I have no idea if those timelines even match.
Written for hillz_85 in SPN_Summergen 2012

Fic is here.
floranna: (Default)
Title: To Tuonela
Fandom: Finnish Mythology
Word Count: 2.543
Characters: OFC, Kullervo, Väinämöinen
Warnings: References to Suicide, Minor Violence, references to sibling incest
Summary: The river was as black as the songs and stories had said and she could feel the coldness from the white water seep into her skin and make her shiver as badly as standing outside in the midwinter.
Author's notes: Some of the italicized parts were taken from Kalevala, translated to English by Keith Bosley, published by Oxford University Press.


Fic is here.
floranna: (Default)
Just letting you know that I'll be posting my fic here from my AO3 account finally here too. Links still to my AO3, but anyway.
floranna: (Default)
Someone willing to do a super-quick beta for a 2,500 long original fic that takes place in Finnish mytology? No need to know a thing about it, actually it's kinda wished that you don't know about it.

Fic consists lots of mentions of suicide.

Someone please save my ass?
floranna: (Default)
I am trying to get into Clarion writing course in San Diego. You must write two atleast 2500 words long original stories there and they'll choose who will get in.

I have written the first one and need a beta. It's modern fantasy with horror elements, non-con sexual situations (between two girls) and body possession. I am also feeling that the beginning may not actually fit the rest of the story, so I'd need a structual and spelling check in it. The betaing should be ready in 26th day, as the deadline is 28th and my dad wants to read it too before I send it.

Please help me, I really want to get into this course, no matter how small the actual chance is. Please help?
floranna: (Default)
I know very little about some of the people on my friends list. Some people I know relatively well. But here's a thought: why not take this opportunity to tell me a little something about yourself. Any old thing at all. Just so the next time I see your name I can say: "Ah, there's Parker ...she likes money and cereal." I'd love it if everyone who's friended me did this. (Yes, even you people who I know really well.) Then post this in your own journal [only if you feel inclined]. In return, ask me anything you'd like to know about me and I'll give you an answer*.

*Providing it's answerable/suitable for public posting.

Granny.

Jan. 1st, 2013 01:58 am
floranna: (Default)
Granny died last night. 30th December 2012, around 10 pm. So.

I might be a wreck, I don't know. I can't make myself think about how she is really gone for forever now. We went to see her (me and my sis, mum and lilbro had come there day earlier) on saturday and she really couldnn't speak, nor did she recognize us I think. She did hold our hands and was restless.

I had to escape during the visit to go to bathroom and I told mum I wouldn't come there anymore, seeing mumma like that hurt too much and I had said my goodbye when she was a bit more coherent. SHe said okay. ANd day later mumma is gone forever.

It took her less than week to deteoriate and die. And I kept praying that she wouldn't suffer and what I hae heard it was very peaceful. They didn't transfer to a hospital, it would have been cruel when doctors or nurses wouldn't have been able to do a thing. Now she got to be in her room where she had lived over three years, surrounded with her own stuff and the great people who work there.

She is one of my greatest heroes. Was. She never did anything 'spectcular'. SHe lived and worked and thrived. She helped her mum and siblings when her father moved to America and left his wife and kids in Finland (it was practically a divorce back then) even if she was the second youngest. SHe worked during the Winter ad Continuation war, was a Lotta, (the kiddie version) got a medal for working so hard in wartime when men were on the front, married, had one daughter and several more 'unofficial' children that she and grandpa raised. They were together atleast 59 years, I am not sure when they got married.

She and grandpa had practically given up on the thought of having grandchildren, so when my mum told her she was pregnant to a man mumma hadn't yet seen at the age of 35, she said: "I had been thinking that I don't have any reason to stay anymore on this world and could die away, but not anymore!" SHe loved all three of us so much (Mum got us when she was 36, 38 and 40. I am the eldest.) and we have never doubted that. SHe kitted so many things and I still have some of her great woollen socks.

I love her so much. She would have been 89 at May 31st. I wish they'll let me carry her casket. They let me carry grandpa's. (From my father's side.)

I only have one grandpa left now.
floranna: (Default)
Christmas started off well. We ate Christmas dinner and opened all of our presents in 24th (we Finns celebrate Christmas on Christmas eve) mom called grandma and she was feeling down and nurses told it might be close. But we new we wre going there on Saturday so we didn't worry too much, even if we knew this would be her last Christmas. Next day, mum calls her again but this time she is in a such bad shape that mum tells she will be going to see her and me and my sister asked to come with her. There was about 400 kms there tp drive, part of it in the dark and snowing heavily. We went there, and she was in such a bad shape, couldn't speak nor was very responding. Next day we go there again and she was only slightly more better, but we all knew it was close.

I felt terrible because when mum, sis and grandpa were all crying, I wasn't. But it came later. I had work today and I felt like I was in some sort of daze, and when I was in bus on my way home the emptyness inside of myself grew just too big and I started crying. Not loud to be noticed, and now I am still doing in in small bursts.

I can't imagine life where mummu is dead. She is one of my most important people and this emptyness, hole in me is terrifying.

I will be in the net around this time. but it will be in small bursts as my concentration is terrible and I honestly cannot seem to be able to do anything that eeds brainpower and to actually do something. I am not in a good shape.

Please, I need pettings.

She is still alive, but it's so close and I am terrified that she is suffering.
floranna: (Default)
Me and my family are again going to our cottage where is no wifi, so I post my Christmas wishes already. ^^ WSork has ran me ragged, so if I need to do something to you, could you please remind me? I will do it after Christmas. Honestly, my memory has the span of a dead goldfish...

Have a very Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays!

Oh, and please post to my thread here:
holiday love meme 2012
my thread here


And I have sent a card to everyone who posted in to the entry or PMed me.
floranna: (Default)
holiday love meme 2012
my thread here


You all kow how much these kind of things mean to me.

I am still sending cards here. Please let me send you one!
floranna: (Default)
Happy Birthday Finland, you are now 95 years old!

I am still sending cards here. Please let me send you one!
floranna: (Default)
Yes, It's again that time of the year. ^^ Comment to this post with your address and you'll receive a card from Finland. Comments are of course hidden, but put there if you would like to send me a cad and I'll pm you my address.

No worries if you can't send me a card, I may actually enjoy sending even more than receiving them. ^^

Please let me send you these! And it's of no matter where you live.
floranna: (Default)
No, seriously, I just had a near full-out freakout when I realized that one of my internet friends hasn't updated her journal nor her twitter in over a year, started asking her friends and people in the twitter if they have heard from her, sure that something terrible has happenend.

She has just been busy with rl, so my heart actually eased a bit from it's panicking.

Now I am feeling spectacularly silly and foolish and want push my head in to a bush like a bunny.

But I am so relieved that nothing has happened to her it's ridiculous.

Oh, and I've gotten a job. =DD I am in the Finland's postal office's logistics center where I sort post packages. I am on an evening shift, so I go to work at 4 pm and leave 10 pm, and arrive at home around 11.30 pm. The funny thing is that I am usually terrible at staying up late, but now it's 0.30 in the night and I am completely awake. Even when I was doing nothing and unemployed I never stayed up this late or slept to 10-11 am. I find it funny.

And I seriously like my job. I love sorting through stuff, looking what kind of packages people get (I don't look the names really, only a bit where they come from and where they go). I also saw a package that came from Pakistan! That was a bright spot on my day.

Now that I am working my eating rythm has gotten magnificiently better and I have lost 3-4 kilos in two weeks. I have one of those step calculators and everyday I break 10 000 steps without even trying. I am getting more fit and feel way much better.

It's only until christmas but there is a possibility that I may get to come back on spring. And next september I'll continue my studying and I feel actually positive that I'll be able to do that.

I actually like my life now, how weird is that? It is to me! =DD

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