floranna

I went today to dentist. There was a cavity on my upper left wisdom tooth and I had decided to take the whole tooth off, because my toothbrush was hard to reach that tooth. First time they asked if that tooth should be just...mended? Patched up? What the fuck is right word? And I pussied out and said yes to that instead of removing it. Few days later I called back and asked to change it to be removed, as I grew some actual balls. They changed it and everything was okay.

Except today. They started to remove it but it was stuck far more than they thought. They worked on it for half an hour, and they had to put local anesthetic to it about three times i the middle of it because it started to hurt.

They finally did get it out and gave the teeth to me. They said that it's just a small cavity but to me it looked enormous. And my tooth is funny shaped and has something white potruding out of it.

Anesthetic is now gone and it's hurting like motherfucker. I have taken pain meds that have given me an ability to do something else than holding my cheek and whimper but it still hurts.

Ad three nights ago one of my bed feet (?) said poks at 2.30 am. I nearly fell of the bed. Guest room was taken so I went to the couch where confused cats and parents poked me awake to wonder why the hell am I there.

I slept last two nights in guest bed but it's completely different than my any previous beds and I sleep badly on it. I wantmy bed back. ANd the pain gone. ATleast before I go to sleep.

I want to go to ComicCon so badly that it hurts.

It's just...I really want to see you guys. In RL. Finland is so small country that in my previous fandoms (which were in Finnish language of course, for example Harry Potter, etc)I got to see people who I admired in internet, other fans and everything. Now, when I live at the the opposite side of the planet all the happenings are just...too far. I can't even AIM because of the timezones nor start the same kind of friendships I have with my Finnish fan-friends. And that fucking hurts.

I have dreamt of going to some con in US, but... I would be going alone. And it would be expensive. I mean, my parents would probaböy loan me the money, if I would pay it back immediatly when I can, but not if I would go completely alone and no-one would be meeting me 'at the other side' to help me through all this stuff.

I want to get to know you people. I really do. Face-to-face. Talk to you. Really.


...


And going to comic-con wuld be cool too, I won't lie about that. And the first sentence is about that there I could probably meet a very big amount of all of you people, right?

But seriously, I rally would like to start meeting you.